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Robert

A Potpourri of Change

Vietnam, Chicago, Michigan, Orlando

by Sasha Alyson

Vietnam for the adventurous, International Mr. Leather for the bold, Michigan for the communal, and Disney World for the young at heart.

Two decades ago, it seemed as if everything happening in the gay community was happening for the first time. Each new gay- or lesbian-themed book, film, or album was cause for note. Apart from Pride gatherings, it was rare to see thousands of people assemble around gay issues. And two men got booted out of Disneyland for dancing together.

No longer! Today we can pick from a number of annual events that, if they weren’t so lively, could be considered veritable institutions. Whether as a repeat participant, or a first-timer, this is the time of year to start planning for three of these events. But first, a look at something quite different.

* * *

The International Mr. Leather contest (773-381-4650 or 800-545-6753) strides into Chicago on Memorial Day weekend, May 25-29. A mere baby twenty years ago — albeit in leather diapers — IML has swapped those diapers for a jockstrap and unwary guests at some of the Windy City’s better hotels will probably wonder what blew in, when they find a table of leathermen next to them at the hotel’s cocktail lounge.

In addition to Sunday night’s IML competition and show are a four-day “world’s largest leather market” and plenty of parties, climaxing in the infamous Black & Blue Ball.

* * *

Keeping with the spirit of its founders, the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival  (231-757-4766) Aug. 8 – 13, 2000 defines itself as “a town that is communally run by each womon who attends.” The town’s population will hit about 6,000, on 630 acres in the northern woods of Michigan. Attendees help with the workload: Preparing wood-fire cooked vegetarian dinners, providing childcare, and putting on over 300 workshops. The workshop schedule for 2000 hasn’t been announced yet, but will probably have as broad a range as 1999: from Practical Self Defense to Lesbian Polyamory and Flamenco Guitar Techniques

Don’t be misled by the name: the Music Festival includes a crafts bazaar, film festival, and networking opportunities for older women, younger women, deaf, and visitors from overseas.

* * *

The newest of these annual events is also the largest: GayDay at Disney World could draw as many as 100,000 gay and lesbian visitors on Saturday, June 3, to celebrate what the organizers call “10 (Y)EARS OF MAGIC”.

Those numbers ensure a fun atmosphere: We could find ourselves in the majority at many theme parks and discos during the weekend. But crowds of this size also require planning. Get your tickets in advance, at a Disney store, through the hotel concierge, or from a Disney ticket office. Arrive early at the theme park of your choice, especially if you’ve set your sights on the Magic Kingdom, or you may not get in.

Other advice from the organizers: Bring a photo ID for the clubs, as many have strict carding policies. Dress for warm weather (think mid-90’s), but also be prepared for a brief thunderstorm in the afternoon; a lightweight poncho could come in handy. Make it a point to thank the Disney staff, who still take considerable heat from the religious right for “allowing” such an event to occur.

Finally: Wear a red shirt! That’s how you’ll recognize others who are there for GayDay. Do not, however, design yourself a red costume. Disney enforces a dress code for its parks, and costumed guests, who would be competition for Mickey, are not allowed. Shirts with offensive slogans are also prohibited — a policy that leaves some room for interpretation — as is the shirtless look. The presence of tens of thousands of red shirts will be a strong enough statement in itself.

Disney World itself officially neither supports nor discourages all this, but cannot be disappointed by the numbers. Several unaffiliated businesses, clubs, and promoters sponsor events on GayDay, and throughout the long weekend.

As for you Californians: If Orlando is too far, wear that red shirt to the third annual Gay Day at the original (Anaheim, Calif.) Disneyland, set for Saturday, October 7, 2000.

March, 2000

Speaking Their Language

by Sasha Alyson

A second language is not necessary, but helps make for a better trip. Rather than a month of language immersion, here are some offerings where you can study at home.

Two American cyclists share gardening stories with a French villager.

In the half-century since World War II, English has become the world’s second language. Walk into almost any major city in the world, and you can check into a hotel room, or order dinner, in English.

So do you need a second language to travel? No. Not if you want to spend your days abroad only in big cities, ordering dinner and checking into hotels. But to meet and fully interact with other people and cultures, you need some knowledge of their language.

For those with the time, a month of immersion school remains the best road to that goal. For the rest of us, there are packages that offer instruction at home. Here are some popular offering.* * *

If you like the Internet, you’ll love the language courses from Syracuse Learning Systems (800-797-5264). These are the most interactive of the systems I looked at. You can play word games on your home computer; install a microphone and watch the Speech Meter light up as your accent improves; then tap into the Web for more.

Some of us learn by listening; others need interaction; yet others remember words best if we associate them with pictures. SLS lets you pick the styles that work for you; that’s a big benefit.

On the other hand, for busy guppies with limited time, games aren’t the most time-efficient way to learn a language. And some of that time will be spent just figuring out which of the myriad SLS programs to purchase. In Spanish alone, the company offers five packages, with varying prices and content.

Still, it was my favorite of the batch. Before buying multimedia packages, check the box carefully to be sure your computer meets ALL the hardware requirements.* * *

Prize for “best at what it does” goes to Champs-Elysees, for its monthly tapes of news stories, features, and music.

With their focus on the culture and current events of a particular country, these tapes are downright interesting — more than one could say for any other language cassettes. They’ll improve your vocabulary and comprehension. But they’re not intended to help you speak better, nor are they for beginners, who will just get frustrated. (800-824-0829)* * *

Berlitz is synonymous with language instruction. I like the Berlitz package I purchased two years ago. Virtually every word on the twelve cassettes was French. Each evening I listened to dialogues and scenarios, repeated them, and responded to questions, all in French. Berlitz’s “Think and Talk French” title was apt, and if Parisians still laugh when I open my mouth, that’s not Berlitz’s fault.

I was disappointed, then, to open Berlitz’s newest version of “Think and Talk” (my sample was German) and to hear an enormous amount of English on the cassette. Listeners are expected to translate back and forth, German to English, a jarring and unnatural process.

Worse, the narrator provides far too much cultural information that doesn’t belong on a language tape. We learn (in English) about German sausages long before we learn (in German) to ask Where is the bathroom? Since you should listen to each tape five or six times, you’ll soon get tired of German sausage — and desperate for that bathroom.

The new Berlitz is still a satisfactory choice for commuters looking to put their driving time to use, and for those put off by SLC’s multi-media approach. But it’s a shame that Berlitz undertook a change merely for the sake of change.* * *

Change for the sake of change is not a problem at Barron’s. Two years ago I bought their expensive French cassettes. The box, with trendy colors, looked modern in the store. Once I got home and the shrink-wrap came off, the tapes and text appeared unchanged since World War II. The book takes a stodgy, rote approach to language. Barron’s also markets a cheaper but equally disappointing “TravelWise” packet of a single cassette tape and book ($16.95), notable primarily for the amount of time the narrator spends telling you, in English, how to relax. I didn’t merely relax; I fell asleep.* * *

Gay travelers will need to supplement these mainstream tapes with something extra. I enjoyed “Hot! International”: An English phrase at the top of each page is translated into six European languages. Don’t be misled by the fact that pronunciations appear with each phrase, however; the book isn’t for novices.

Granted, there’s some logical sequence to the phrases: What’s your astrological sign? is translated at the beginning; But I’ll try it appears mid-book; then I forgive you; and finally, We could live together in your country. But you won’t quickly find the phrase you need, when you need it, by thumbing through the book at random. I can think of three potential uses for “Hot! International”:

  • If you already have mastery of a language, use it to expand your vocabulary beyond what’s on the Berlitz tape. Considerably beyond.
  • Bring it along on your first date and thumb through it with your new friend. This requires some sense of humor on everyone’s part, but should help you quickly break the ice.
  • Truly adventurous types, of course, can merely memorize the translations of “But I’ll try it”, and see what happens.

Home away from home

by Sasha Alyson

If travel, for you, means experiencing other cultures, then consider a homestay for your next vacation.

Homestays let a traveler see more of the daily life of another society, such as this market in Morocco.

“What I like best about travel is forgetting about work,” says Deborah. “I plan my trips to keep me occupied, both physically and mentally. If I just spread out on the beach, it takes half the week before I stop thinking about the upcoming budget meeting.”

Jason travels to relax. “I love cruises. There’s always something new to do and lots of people to meet. Somebody else does all the planning. I can just show up and have a good time.”

“The best part of travel is discovering the entirely different ways that people live,” says David. “I stayed with a family in rural Italy last fall. I’d say this family had about a third the buying power of their American counterparts. And yet their quality of life seemed every bit as high or mine, or that of my friends. Way superior, in some ways. It was an eye-opening experience for me.”

* * *

Three people, three entirely different motivations for travel. Deborah and Jason will always have an easy time finding the vacations they like. For those like David, who want to up-close experience other ways of living, it can be harder.

David was traveling as a member of Servas, an organization specifically set up to arrange two-day homestays for travelers who want more personal contact in the spots they’re visiting. Servas was formed after World War II as part of the pacifist movement, on the premise that we’d all be more reluctant to declare war on another country if we had had friends there, and better understood its culture (and cultural differences). It isn’t a gay organization, but for many years, Servas has included sexual orientation in the non-discrimination pledge that members are asked to sign.

Traveling as a Servas member is simple and decentralized, but takes advance planning. Prospective members are interviewed to be sure they understand the spirit of the organization. Then they get a list of hosts in the country they plan to visit. Hosts include single people and families, students, working people, retirees, and perhaps a few idle rich. The list briefly describes each host, their interests, languages spoken, and where they live. Then it’s up to the traveler to ask prospective hosts if they can accommodate a visit on a certain date.

You can also be Servas host, an ideal situation for people who can’t travel as much as they’d like to, but who enjoy contact with people from other countries. A host simply agrees to be listed; travelers contact you, and if the timing is inconvenient, you simply give your regrets. There’s no obligation at any time.

I’ve been a member of Servas as both a traveler and a host (and recommended it to my friend David, quoted above). Both experiences rank among my most treasured travel memories, and I stayed in touch with a half-dozen people I met. I traveled in western Europe, but Servas has members in 135 countries.

Servas isn’t for you if you primarily want to travel within a gay or lesbian milieu. Most hosts are not gay; some are, but may or may not say so on the list. And you should understand that you aren’t meeting a true cross-section of the population: Becoming a Servas host involves quite a bit of self-selection. But if you’re eager to meet a wide variety of friendly people, and to experience close-up how another society functions, I cannot recommend it too highly. (Servas: 212-267-0252)

* * *

A different, and explicitly gay, approach to home visits is taken by Mi Casa, Su Casa, whose primary service is arranging homeswaps for traveling gay men and lesbians. Since 1992, Mi Casa, Su Casa has helped gay and lesbian travelers for whom even the smallest hotel is still too commercial.

The company’s primary service is homeswaps. You’re going to Barcelona for a week and Fernando wants to visit the U.S., so you juggle your schedules, and you stay in his otherwise-empty home or apartment while he stays in yours. You may never meet Fernando, but after living in one another’s abode, you’ll share a bond that can often translate into continued contact. You may meet some of Fernando’s neighbors and friends, and feel more a part of the community that a typical tourist could.

Mi Casa, Su Casa also also offers other arrangements: Brief homestays while the host is at home, which you later reciprocate; and even ways just to rent a room in someone’s home for a longer or shorter period. Mi Casa, Su Casa. (800-215-CASA)

February, 2000

FOLLOW-UP: Mi Casa, Su Casa went through an inactive period early in 2001, but is back in business with a new owner. A similar service is also now offered byHome Around the World.According to its site: “Members in over 20 countries delight in offering other gay travellers a warm welcome, whether exchanging homes, offering hospitality, being a paying guest, renting an apartment or simply looking for new friends. Gay travel has never been more affordable, so easy and so much fun!”

Another newer service is Gay Homestays, based in England and offering a variety of homestays, self-catered apartments, and gay B&Bs throughout much of Europe, and in a growing number of other countries.

Sailing the Friendly Seas

by Sasha Alyson

A cruise is an extremely popular way to vacation for many lesbians and gay men.

The S/V Polynesia will take gay travelers to the Caribbean islands of St. Barts, Anguilla, and Saba, in 1999.

As the autumn air turns crips, many of us start thinking about a warm-weather escape for the coming winter. A generation ago, that meant finding a beach resort and spreading your towel on the sand. But over the past two decades, cruises have skyrocketed in popularity.

Some vacationers are still skeptical, of course. “For several years, I resisted the idea of a cruise, because I didn’t care to be stuck on a boat all day,” Brian told me. “Finally I had a new boyfriend who really wanted to go on an RSVP cruise. We had a great time — and never a dull moment. It wasn’t at all what I had expected.”

Four companies offer a variety of choices for gay men and lesbians looking for a cruise where they won’t feel uncomfortable holding hands on deck:* * *

Way back in the 1970s, Windjammer Barefoot Cruises (800-327-2601) pegged one or two sailings a year to be gay, making it a true pioneer. I enjoyed everything but the food on my 1984 Windjammer voyage, and recent customers assure me that meals have improved since then. The company has also added entertainment for its gay departures: California drag performer Teflon Pan was on deck for the 1998 trips — but the old Windjammer standby, the crab race, hasn’t been forgotten.

Try Windjammer if you’d enjoy a smaller group (the four-masted schooner S/V Polynesia, with a gay departure set for Sept. 6, 1999, holds 126 passengers), and prefer snorkeling, hiking, or exploring an island over pool-party mixers. While improved since 1984, meals will be less elaborate than on the larger cruise vessels, and entertainment less elaborate. On the other hand, the informal atmosphere makes it easy to meet everyone on board, and a small Windjammer vessel can set anchor at out-of-the-way ports that are off limits to a ship about to disgorge a thousand passengers. Women are welcome on Windjammer’s gay cruises, but most departures turn out to be all-male affairs, with far more couples than single guests.* * *

Windjammer was first, but it was RSVP (800-328-7787) that really opened up the gay cruise market. RSVP’s 5-day Caribbean excursion (Feb. 13-18) could be just the ticket if you’re still not sure you want a whole week on a boat. You’ll get a full sampling of the cruise life: snorkeling, shopping, pool games, and underwear parties. RSVP also offers a 9-day Caribbean cruise departing Feb. 4. (Their week-long departures to Greece and Thailand are already sold out for 1999.)

With some 70 sailings under its waterline, RSVP is justly known for the smooth organization of its cruises, and for bringing aboard high-caliber entertainment. In addition to the ubiquitous tea dances, costume balls, and “dating game” mixers, past cruises have offered everything from tea with Harvey Fierstein to financial seminars to a presentation by Oregon activist Donna Redwing. Perennial favorite Danny Williams will return as MC in 1999, ready to offend all guests equally.

A typical RSVP cruise is about half couples, half singles. Women (nearly all as couples) account for 10-15% of a typical departure, says spokesman Paul Figlmiller.* * *

Atlantis Events (800-628-5268), best known for its Club-Med style beach vacations, now offers an annual cruise, as well. Its January 31 Caribbean trip is billed as “the largest all-gay cruise ever” with space for 1700 passengers.

What’s the difference between RSVP and Atlantis? Not a great deal. Atlantis’s brochures have more of a circuit-party look than do RSVP’s, and although hard statistics aren’t available, Atlantis seems to draw a slightly younger crowd, more single men, and fewer women. RSVP, with the benefit of many years’ experience, sets a high standard of professionalism and organization.* * *

Olivia Cruises and Resorts (800-631-6277) is a women-owned company serving almost entirely a lesbian clientele. Olivia gets a much higher percentage of couples than do the mostly-male ships — as high as 75% to 80% for a typical sailing. On a ship of 500 women, however, that still leaves a hundred who arrived by themselves, and Olivia has a designated Singles Coordinator to make sure they all get a chance to meet. Olivia’s 1999 destinations include the Caribbean, Greece, and Alaska.* * *

Every ship has a tier of prices, depending on size and location of your room, ranging from $583 for an inside cabin on RSVP’s 5-day cruise to $731 for a standard Windjammer share, and up to $3000 for the top cabins on the big ships. (These prices reflect the list price that appears in big print in the brochures, plus port taxes, mandatory “gratuities” and other surcharges of anywhere from $40 to $300 per passenger that somehow end up in a less visible spot.)

When budgeting, remember also that you’ll have to get to the departure point: Miami is cheaper than St. Martin.

November, 1998

A Taste of Tuscany

by Sasha Alyson

The Italian region of Tuscany draws gay vacations with its cuisine, history, and architecture.

The Piazza del Campo in Siena, in the heart of Tuscany, is considered by many travelers to be the most beautiful public plaza in the world.

If geographic names could be trademarked, Tuscany would be today’s leading brand. “Given a choice of places to spend a month, which name would you select – Tuscany or Cyberspace?” asked New York Times columnist Russell Baker in 1995. Even then, “Tuscany” evoked images of enchanting medieval towns, sprawling cypress trees, and ancient stonework.

The reputation has grown since then, spurred along by Frances Mayes’s deservedly best-selling book, Under the Tuscan Sun. For gay men and lesbians, too, Tuscany beckons. As a gay tour operator, my company receives more requests for trips to Tuscany than for any other destination. Certainly, part of the lure lies in all those Renaissance statues of naked men. (And a few of naked women. Given that the sculptors themselves were virtually all male, what shall we make of that disparity?)

But Tuscany’s greatest appeal is that within one small, beautiful corner of the world you can indulge in such a wealth of experiences. Pick your interest: Tuscany has something for you.

Foodies will be in heaven when they enter the region. Visit one of the independent wineries, operating from a five-centuries-old stone barn tucked away amidst the majesty of the “Chianti Classico” hills, then enjoy their wine along with a hearty dinner of risotto and fresh-picked wild mushrooms, in a small restaurant. There’s no limit to what a blazing fire in a cozy dining room will do to your appetite!

History buffs? You’re in luck. The Etruscan bridges, arches, and burial mounds of the region date back to 700 B.C. The Romans left their mark too, but Tuscany’s true glory came in the Middle Ages, when Florence and Siena vied to become the most magnificent city in northern Italy. The churches, gardens, public buildings, and palaces of that era remain a primary attraction for visitors.

Art historians? You already knew you wanted to come here. The museums of Florence alone could take up an entire week, then you still have such jewels as the series of 36 Renaissance frescoes at the cloister of Monte Oliveto Maggiore. Architects can visit the roofless abbey ruins at San Galgano one day, imagining its former grandeur seven centuries ago; the next day, admire the gilded dome and inlaid marble floors of Siena’s Gothic cathedral. And even unbiased critics agree with the Sienans who proclaim their breathtaking Piazza del Campo to be “the most beautiful public plaza in the world.”

Outdoor enthusiasts? The region is laced with spectacular hiking trails, from hour-long rambles to all-day excursions. Biking is popular, and with good reason, but be prepared for hills; while Tuscan biking will amply reward your efforts, it isn’t for beginners.

* * *

Despite this rich variety, the best of Tuscany lies within a small area. There’s no need to pack your suitcase and move to a new town each night. Simply find a comfortable base, rent a car (or bikes, if you’re ambitious) then make day trips to the spots that interest you.

For those more interested in art, architecture, and a modest level of gay nightlife, Florence is a logical base. Here you’ve got a choice of several gay-friendly hotels. One explicitly gay establishment is Hotel Medici (via dei Medici 6; 055/284818; Fax 055/216202), comfortable and moderately priced but be forewarned: Reception is on the fifth floor. A longer list of “gay-friendly” establishments appears on an Internet guide to Tuscany. Note that “gay-friendly” means only what it says in this case. These hotels welcome lesbian and gay visitors, but don’t expect to find a large gay crowd at most. Escape the city one day by renting a bike from Andrea and Marika at “Florence by Bike” (Via San Zanobi 120/122 R, near the train station; 055/488992). They’ll supply you with maps and advice. Florence is also home to Italy’s first gay bar and disco, hot and saucy Tabasco.

Parking can be a nightmare in towns whose streets and walls predate the first automobile by many centuries. If you’ll be spending much of your time in the countryside anyway, you can reduce your budget and eliminate some headaches by staying at hotels in smaller towns or countryside. You won’t find much in the way of gay culture here; instead, you’ll discover just how warm and welcoming the locals are. A beautiful and friendly spot is Castelvecchi (0577 738050) in the picturesque town of Radda-in-Chianti. In Certaldo, outside of charming San Gimignamo, try Hotel Latini (0577 945019). You can generally find someone who speaks English at all the spots I’ve mentioned.

One other option is to rent a villa in the countryside. While some villas are small enough to be appropriate for just one couple, this choice is most appealing for a group of four to eight friends. Share the costs, the driving, and the cooking – but keep a few evenings free to see what the local restaurant can produce. Many websites advertise such villas; one that welcomes gay clients is the Barclay International Group (800 845-6636)

 January, 2000

Sand, Celebrations, and Search Engines

by Sasha Alyson

Looking for a warm winter getaway? Making last-minute Millennium plans? Here are some suggestions.

Time will take on a different meaning for those who join Family Abroad to greet the Millennium surrounded by the pyramids, camels, and history of Egypt.

As winter approaches, many of us start looking for a warm-weather getaway to break up the weeks of grey. If a good beach is among your vacation priorities, here are some spots to consider.

For those who enjoy the sand more than the water, South Africa’s beaches are superb. Half a dozen beaches around Capetown offer golden sand and beautiful vistas. Clothing-optional Sandy Bay Beach, nestled against the dunes, is particularly popular with gay visitors. But be warned: The Capetown sun may be warm, but the waters are cold.

Warmer waters await in Hawaii, which would dominate anybody’s list of the world’s best beaches. Allen Walden, whose agency Gay Travel Plus (877-845-1660) gives him a wide perspective, says his favorite waves are at Waikiki, “simply because of the outstanding pure blue turquoise of the water.” Volcanic formations along the shoreline also add to the scenery. A more unusual Hawaiian getaway is Kehena Beach, on the island of Hawaii, created by a volcanic eruption in the 1950s. Now Kehena is awash in black sand, gay men, and nude sunbathers — quite a combination.

Closer to home, you can dance as well as swim if you head to Florida for White Party Week, Nov. 24-28 (305-757-44448). More than 15,000 of our nation’s hunkiest come together to raise money for a local AIDS organization. It’s hosted at Vizcaya, a sixteenth-century Italian Renaissance-styled villa with formal gardens. And it’s white all right: Expect to see guests attired in everything from white boxer shorts to white gowns sparkling in the sunlight. The week’s festivities include a host of parties, each with its own theme: White Party, Noche Blanca, Salvation, Snow Ball, Muscle Beach, and The Victory Party.* * *

Still don’t know where you’ll be when the Millennium arrives? You’re not alone. Despite all the hype last January, with the implied threat that you’d better “reserve early and pay through the nose” or be left in the cold, lots of New Year’s packages still have space. In general, however, prices have not dropped significantly; expect to pay a premium for Millennium travel. Some of your choices from gay tour operators:

Above and Beyond still has limited space for a nine-day extravaganza on Fuji’s Coral Coast. New Year’s Eve features a poolside dinner and show, fireworks, and dancing all night (800-397-2681). Air from LA is included, with prices starting at $2698.

It somehow seems appropriate to welcome a new millennium amidst pyramids that have seen their share of millennia roll by. Join Family Abroad (800-999-5500) in Egypt, on a package which includes a celebration at the great pyramid of Cheops, along with tours of Aswan, Luxor, and the Valley of the Kings. With air from New York, $4795.

Mariah Wilderness Expeditions (800-462-7424) has a few spots left for women on trips to Peru and Baja. The price is right ($1395-$1495), but call soon if you’re interested. And Davids Trips and Tours (888-723-0699) can put you amidst a celebration in New Orleans (from $1200) or a game lodge in Botswana ($6500). Airfare is not included on these, so be sure plane tickets are available, at a price you’re willing to pay, before committing.

* * *

More and more of us use the web to explore our travel options. Gay travelers face a special problem when using Internet search engines, because once you include the word “gay” in your search terms, some engines swamp you with porn sites. For my May 1998 column, I compared the leading search engines to see which performed best. The contrast was dramatic; some engines found not a single truly relevant site in their top 10 listings for a phrase such as “gay Paris hotel”; others were right on the money.

Equally dramatic is the extent to which some engines have improved, while others have deteriorated, since then.

Excite, a waste of time 18 months ago, now ranks well above average. Infoseek still remains top-notch. Alta Vista and Hot Bot, two of my favorites back in 1998, have become largely irrelevant. But my favorite is a new one: Google, which blows away the competition in its ability to find the sites you want, put the most relevant pages first, and screen out the spam.

If you haven’t used search engines, or tried and gave up, experiment with Google. Just remember to type in several words to define the subject matter you want. Ask for “gay travel”, and the request is so vague that no human being or program will know what you really want. But type in something more specific, like “gay cruise ship Mexico”, and you’ll quickly see just what’s out there. Not long ago, the Information Highway seemed more like a swamp. With search tools like Google, it has become a freeway.

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